Asking for a Friend

 

I'm only asking for someone 
who wants to know: how soon 

after you wake up is it acceptable 
to take a nap? Can you take personal

days off if you are unemployed? If 
you forge the signature of a close

relative on a check, does that count
as a real crime? If your stepmother

has developed such a fear of dying,
is it cool to suggest she might

benefit from swapping her bed for
a satin-lined coffin? And is it ok to tell

her ill-mannered children they'll never
amount to anything anyway, as proven

by the ugly knobs of shoulder blades
where there could've been angel wings?