No one called it that when you were growing up: only, That's what families are like—language sharper than a knife, blunter than a blow to the skull. Ruthless love: such love, they said, the truest sign you mean something to some- body. No physical scars or wounds necessary—they don't compare to the volley of words you remember lifetimes later: awan nga bain, agraraman, awan pagbalbalinam. Whatever you've made of yourself, those dark stones rattle in pockets, slosh in the gut.